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to love and to rest | of life and love

Amaka Felly – Nigeria

These thoughts,
these hopeless thoughts,
that got me to think,
to believe as they have said,
as a woman to be complete
only comes by that fragrance of a man
who takes the role of husband.

 
Those insane thoughts,
that actually made me mad,
to look at my glowing life in the mirror
and call myself unfulfilled,
to remain weak  and eat endless bars of sorrow
and lament  for when a man will come.

 
To listen to my mother’s tale,
my grandmother’s stories –
on how they all got theirs young,
to weep at my mother’s feet every night –
on how my heart got broken again,
and take in thousands of teaching
on how I will keep the next man.

 

For I have awoken this morning
in another heart break and this is
the fiftieth teachings I have learnt
from my mother’s feet and none
have ever worked.

 

I had looked at my glowing skin
and life and remembered how
I had lost years trying  so hard to please
and I have said to myself
no more of this life torture,
my heart needs some rest.

 

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