She got home really confused. Her domestic staff were surprised to see her back so soon. They muttered among themselves…. “She’s back …gosh”
She went straight to her room and ordered them not to disturb her…” I am not expecting anyone so anyone who shows up should be sent back.”
They went away to their different positions.
In Australia, Tade had to answer a lot of questions. The kids needed to know why they left without their mum. Not really because she had a strong bond with the children but because it was the first time they went on vacation without her and they noticed a bit of coldness in their Dad.
“Dad, Tomi and I had a discussion this morning. We wish mum could be as close to us as you are. She’s always busy with other things except us.”
“My darling, let’s hope things will get better with mum. She will be able to manage her schedule soon enough to have that time to attend to you just as you want. I am sure you love your mum and I love her more … “
“Oh Daddy … thank you.”
“Let’s check our itinerary for today. I have meeting with a friend in about half an hour and you just have to wait. When I return, we will go to the park.” Tade tried to carry on but sincerely a part of him missed his wife. Yes, Funke could be extremely unbearable and she lacked so many values as a wife but Trade’s love for her is beyond her excesses. Though he was beginning to get tired, he still longed so much for her love. He felt she could get better and wanted to give it a try. He had made several sacrifices in the past 15 years, even His friend thought he was stupid but he is such a God-fearing man, who’s willing to pull through.
Phone rings… Funke jumped out of bed hoping to see a call from Tade but it was Shalewa. She let the phone ring through and then she switched it off. One week had gone, she reflected on her discussion with her friend. “How will I cope? I have to go to market, cook all the meals, manage my store, help the kids with school..oh no…I can’t…I can’t…God please help me. I need you now. I have not given my best to my family but it is not too late to start.I never knew Shalewa had it all in order…..hmmn…” She was a total mess. Several questions ran through her mind. Tade spoke of war… What kind of war….That was strange , coming from him.
It was another weekend, she decided to visit her mother-in-law, who was stunned to see her. She took gifts and planned to spend the day with her. The woman couldn’t help but ask what the problem was.
“Yes Maami (mother)”
“Did you have a dream I passed away?”
“Haaaa… Maami, why would you say such a thing. I came to spend some time with you”
“Really, hmmmn…. Olufunke…. even though my son refused to share details with me, I know he’s not been a happy man and all efforts to address issues with you failed. What brings you to my home. The last time you entered my home was when my husband passed, precisely 2years ago.”
Funke broke down in tears. She held her mother in laws leg bowing her head down. Maami, edariji mi (mother forgive me)” Her husband’s mother was surprised at this outburst of emotions. She pulled her and embraced her. They had a long
talk and she ended up spending the night.
To cut this short, four days before her family’s arrival, she laid off all her domestic staff except the one at the gate. She prepared soups in varieties with Shalewa’s help. She didn’t even have to go to church to see Pastor’s wife. She had a long counselling session with her friend and she determined in her heart to turn a new leaf.
It was a Friday evening and her family was back after three good weeks. The children ran up to meet their mum and she embraced them so dearly. Tade was a bit withdrawn. He just gave her a hug and went about others things. She took her kids and gave them a good warm bath, served them supper and then saw them to bed. The kids asked where the maids went , she didn’t give a definite answer and they didn’t probe further. They were shocked at the new mum they saw.
Funke left the kids room and went to theirs, Tade wasn’t there. Where could he be, as a matter of fact he was not in the house that night. Funke was furious. She almost had a relapse….
On phone…”Shalewa… hmnnnn (yelling ) he’s gone… I dont know where to. I am trying to change but it seems Tade is done. What do I do? You know this new life is all strange to me and I don’t think I can carry on if this is what Tade wants to do to me.”
” I have a very simple answer for you Funke, Tade has put up with you for 15years…. Compare 15 years of misery to one night of of misery. Be wise. Go back to the notes you took from our counselling sessions, have a good night rest darling. Don’t call this line except you want to tell me you are making progress.” She hung up.
Tade came in the next day, he observed all the changes in his wife but he turned a blind eye. He took the kids to his mother to spend the last lap of their vacation. He wanted to shield them away from the scene at home. He wouldn’t eat from her, he would not talk to her. Funke practically shut down her store, she wept severally trying to get her husband’s attention but all was not working. This went on for a week. By the second week, she turned one of the guest rooms in to a prayer and study room. She didn’t want to lose her home, she cried and prayed. She fasted 3days for the very first time. Tade on the other hand was enjoying the show.
Towards the end of the second week, it was a Thursday morning, Tade woke up early and made breakfast. He had a business meeting that morning. His wife prayed all night and fell asleep while praying. He served the breakfast and took it to the room where she was. He entered quietly and sat beside her on the floor. He placed the tray right beside the bed.
“Wake up darling” he taped her. Funke opened her eyes…”sweetheart…..” “Yes my love ” Tade answered. She wanted to speak but he stopped her with a kiss. “I love you my wife. I am willing to help you through this. I hate what I have done in the last two weeks but that’s nothing compared to what I have put up with in the last 15 years. “
Funke cried profusely.Tade embraced her. I am here for you my darling. Not many men can put up with this, but I thank God for His Grace upon my life. I need to go. He got up and left for work.
Funke couldn’t wait to share with Shalewa but she had a night shift and her phone was off. She got up. Cleaned the house, went straight to Shalewa’s house.
“I need you please, help me with this.” It was a huge sacrifice. Shalewa went with her and helped her with some very nice meals. It lasted for about 3hours and she rushed back to her house.
That night was the beginning of a new life in their home. They resolved all their differences. Tade found out Shalewa wasn’t a bad influence after all. Thank God for His Grace.
1. There are so many men suffering the fate Tade suffered in this story. (When it’s the woman, there’s so much noise….some men make huge sacrifices for peace)
2. Don’t you want to be a great friend like Shalewa who was bold enough to tell her friend the truth
3. How many women are out there, who could actually bury their pride and solve their marital problems like Funke. (You can do it)
4. Be discreet with your marital issues exception in the case of violence and abuse. If it’s not necessary to share and you know you can handle it, act like Tade.
5. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Shalewa was not a bad influence after all
6. Treat your domestic staff like human beings. Empower them if you can. Don’t maltreat them , if you can’t cope with them, let them go. God made them too.
7. Don’t write that man or woman off, people change
8. Be a good mother-in-law or father-in-law….Don’t add to your children’s problems, be wise.
9. I wrote this story and I have lessons from it too.
Has this blessed you in anyway? Thank you so much and God bless you.
Copyright: Bukky Adediran 2017.